Bachlorettes

>One of my very best friends and very favorite people is getting married next Saturday in a small ceremony on an island off the coast of Maine. I’m sure it will be beautiful and very proper. Tonight was definitely about being improper.

We’re past the age of paper penises, feather tiaras and tequila shots of strange men’s bodies. I’m okay with that. We are not, however, past the point of being lively and inappropriate. I hope this is always the case.

Tonight we went out for her bachlorette party. It started out with a lovely drink on the rooftop terrace of Solera, the very restaurant that was the subject of my first ever blog post. It was a classy start to the night but it all went downhill from there. It always does, doesn’t it? In fact, I’m surprised at how easily typing this at the moment given the amount of liquor (and cheese) I consumed this evening. It reminds me of college when I wrote an entire paper about amniocentesis for a human bio course whilst completely smashed. I got an A.

After Solera, we walked two blocks to the Melting Pot which I’m sure you all know is a national chain fondue restaurant. Fondue is amazing and the group of ladies tonight are ‘eaters’ for certain. We all played athletics together in college and we are known for our eating abilities. Luckily, I’d done some pretty intense interval training earlier in the day so I could stuff myself full of cheese, and other stuff, all night long. We’ll see how I feel about that in the morning.

We embarked on an evening of eating food off hot, sharp pokers and drinking. We saved all inappropriate conversation until the other customers in our room (a family with children) left. We are immature, not rude and thoughtless after all. Game 1 involved writing and sharing aloud love and life tips for the soon-to-wed couple. Many of them were good and practical, like, “Never promise to do all the laundry in exchange for all of the yard work.” Most of the girls offered one suggestion. I had 13. None of them can be shared on so public a forum. I made a new bestie who I think I will have a lovely relationship with. I think I made our waiter blush. I definitely made the bus-boy blush. Perhaps they should not have interrupted my reading. I definitely made the bride blush/giggle. She however, should have been fully prepared. We lived together for a whole year at the young ages of 22 and 21. She was my last roommate before Senor and I was her last roommate before her fiance. There’s a lot about her that the other girls didn’t know and I, apparently, have no filter when I drink.

I’m pretty outgoing and friendly, I think, although I also tend to dislike most humans until you prove yourself to me. This is very easy to do and I think it’s less that I dislike everyone but more that I’m afraid of everyone and once you smile, I will love you forever. This was an issue when I first met Senor. I was TERRIFIED of him and he thought I was B. Really, I was just afraid. Anyway. I went to a college where socially awkward was the new cool before it was cool to be socially awkward. I’m usually the most socially apt person at a Mac function, but I’m still pretty awkward compared to your average human. Tonight was definitely no exception. I probably share too much. I probably make others nervous. Luckily I’m pretty sure I make them laugh (at me) as well so I’m okay with that. And hopefully K had a really good time, a lot of laughs, and left with some valuable advice. I left stumbling to my ride (Senor, picking me up of course), tipsy and full of cheese, with chocolate sauce on my blouse (fondue can be really hard!) and a waite-staff who probably feared to open the check after we left. There was nothing bad in there, I promise. Everything naughty went into K’s purse. Maybe instead of talking about food I should write about sex tips? Maybe not.

Did I mention how amazing Senor is? This year I’ve been to many bachlorette parties. One was in NYC and on my birthday. When I lost my job and knew I couldn’t go, Senor bought my ticket and drove me to and from the airport. When the party was for three brides at once, senor took me there and picked me up, AND came during the middle of the party to take my backpack home so I didn’t have to hault it to the bar. And tonight he drove me there, picked me up, drove my friend to her car on the other side of downtown and didn’t complain once even though he has to work at 5am and I left him home alone with just a frozen pizza for dinner. I think my best advice to K should have been, “make sure you have a man who will do anything for you and will love you when you’re at your most ridiculous and you’ll always be happy.” Hopefully, she’s already found that in her boy.

No pictures of tonight. I don’t know where my camera/memory card is and I don’t think they belong on a public forum anyway! 😀

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3 Comments on “Bachlorettes”

  1. Jessica says:

    >Sounds like you guys had a blast!

  2. Kate says:

    >"I went to a college where socially awkward was the new cool before it was cool to be socially awkward.". I love it. And you! ❤

  3. Wee says:

    >Yay! I love you too! Sad you couldn't come to the game tonight, btw.


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