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Last week, I found a dried up earwig on my office floor. GROSS. I didn’t actually know what it was so I took a picture before I threw it in the trash. Luckily, MPR had a special story about the infestation (ew) of earwigs (double ew) in Minnesota (gah!). Of course I was curious to find out if the dried up, super-creepy bug in my office was an earwig. One quick Google search later and I had my answer. It was an earwig all right. A male one. Yeah, I’m that good.

Today, in less than 2 minutes I encountered both a tick and a glow worm. I don’t know what else to call it.

The tick was in the first floor ladies room, on the wall. I am very good at identifying ticks, ever since our visit to the UP over Memorial Day when Senor had one on him within seconds of sitting down at the deer camp, and when I found one on the bathroom wall (recurring theme?) as well as on my body in a location which had been covered by both pants and underpants (unacceptable!). I had about a month of freaking out every time something brushed against me and was convinced ticks were going to kill and eat me. I did not appreciate seeing the tick in the bathroom.

After leaving the bathroom I returned to the lunch room where I had placed my lunch in the microwave and had left the Pyrex cover on one of the tables. A weird green thing was on the edge of my cover. It looked like a piece of green foam and I almost flicked it off and thought nothing of it. Upon closer investigation I saw segmentation and itty bitty hairs/legs/feelers/antenna/whatever you want to call bug-fuzz. GROSS! Extra Gross! It was bright, neon green. A color I didn’t realize was made in nature. What was it? A caterpillar? A worm? Some worm-like bug? I don’t know but I do know that I shook it off in the sink and when the water hit it, it started squirming around. Definitely a bug. Definitely alive. Definitely not on the cover when I took it off (it would have been squished as it was on the rim of the cover) but somehow migrated onto my food cover in the 2-minute time period in which I was having an encounter with a tick.

My question is, where the F are my coworkers venturing that the building is infested with so many (exotic) bugs? Seriously guys? We work off the highway, adjacent to a day care and a Starbucks. Target and the mall are five blocks away. There is a woody residential area across the street, but there’s no reason to really go over there. Bah. Too many bugs.

I do not like bugs. I’m not sure if this came across or not. I don’t mind a fat, fuzzy bumble bee in my tomato plants but all other bugs, bah. I HATE bees (other than the fat fuzzy kind) and will run, yelping away from them. I’m not as bad as that with other bugs but I do not appreciate their existence in indoor spaces. Worms, ants, beetles, etc. in the outdoors are fine. I appreciate them in my garden. I even let the wasps at the garden be as I know they eat pests that might eat my plants. But that’s OUTSIDE. A green glow worm on my food’s cover? Uncool kids. Dear coworkers, stop bringing bugs inside and stop venturing into the forest at lunch time.

xo, wee


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